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Friday, September 30, 2016

Friday I'm in Love

Fri-YAY!!! Where have you been? While it's definitely been a productive week around here, it's also been stressful. I had to fast for a blood test today which meant no coffee this morning. The horror. This mama is ready for some down time + a cold one. On the positive side, it's finally feeling like fall and that means lots of favorites. So many favorites. I won't bombard you with them all but it just wouldn't be right if I didn't share a few. 


I love navy nails for fall and I finally found the perfect shade. 

A neutral pair of booties is a staple in my fall wardrobe but I've been hesitant to go the open toe route. This pair changed my mind. 

I tend to be a bit of a candle hoarder all year long but the fall scents are by far and away my favorite.This one is at the top of the list, makes your house smell like pancakes.

I've been drooling over all the pumpkin and apple recipes on Pinterest but I absolutely must try these pumpkin gooey butter cakes

If you came to my house you might say I've gone a bit pumpkin crazy with my fall decor. But I added an adorable print to break up the madness. 

This isn't fall related but my sister showed me this hilarious video about breastfeeding in public and I'm a sucker for sarcastic humor. 

Have the happiest weekend friends!



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Thursday, September 29, 2016

My Breastfeeding Experience

I've started this post probably 10 times before deciding there is no other way to begin then, well, the beginning. I was a breastfed baby. Most of my friends have or are currently breastfeeding their babies. Seeing or hearing about other people breastfeeding never phased me in the least. But thinking of doing it myself....CRINGE. The idea of breastfeeding my own baby totally freaked me out. I hoped that maybe my line of thinking would change once I was pregnant. Nope. So how did I end up writing a blog post about breastfeeding my 12 week old? Grab a snack kids because this is gonna be a long one. 

I made the decision that I would at least give breastfeeding a shot. If it didn't work out, it didn't work out but for me, trying was important. Why? In all honesty the money saving aspect was appealing but there was also just that feeling. Something inside me was saying to go for it. Sounds kind of crazy, right? I wish I had a better answer for you but really, against all the discomfort and anxiety I felt about it, I just knew I had to try. 


Of course I imagined I would get to nurse my baby for the first time shortly after birth. But my baby had other plans. After Fallon arrived at the children's hospital we learned she would need to stay strictly on fluids until the following day, no nursing. That first night a kind nurse brought in a breast pump, showed me how to use it and left me to it. I was running on adrenaline and after all that had happened after giving birth, learning to pump wasn't something I had time to worry over. I just did it, almost like I was on autopilot even though I had zero experience. I continued to get the hang of it throughout the night, making sure to pump every 3 hours to help my milk come in. 


The next day I was finally allowed to try nursing Fallon. Here's where the real story begins. I knew almost immediately it wasn't going to work. After 24 hours on only fluids my baby was really hungry.  She was hooked up to all kinds of wires that made it difficult and awkward to hold her without pulling something. The lactation specialist was very nice but I was beyond uncomfortable sitting there in the NICU with just a few screens between us and the rest of the room. She was trying to give me direction but Fallon was screaming before I could even attempt to get her into position. The following attempts over the next few hours failed miserably and I was getting frustrated. It wasn't because I felt bad that my baby wasn't nursing, like I was doing something wrong or that breastfeeding wasn't going to work out. I just wanted my little girl to be able to eat, period. I kept pumping but my milk hadn't arrived. We were hoping to go home the following day as Fallon was doing well in all other aspects aside from feeding but that was becoming less of a possibility the longer she didn't eat. Chris and I shared a look after another failed nursing attempt and I told the nurse that my baby needed a bottle. The medical team was hesitant because my plan was to breastfeed but I was adamant. It seemed incredibly selfish to continue to starve Fallon while attempting to force her to nurse when it clearly was just making her upset and agitated. She didn't want to take the bottle at first either, but it was a gentle refusal as opposed to the blood curdling screaming when trying to nurse. Never fear, daddy to the rescue. Chris held her upright, wiggled the bottle into her mouth and just like that, she was eating. I kept pumping and Chris kept bottle feeding her until we were discharged. I did continue attempting to nurse first at each feeding and she latched on our last try but was too lazy to suck. The lactation ladies had given me the tools to try at home on my own and I planned to, but I was just so beyond relieved that Fallon was eating at all.


During one of the failed nursing attempts one of the lactation consultants had me try a nipple shield. She said I was kind of flat on one side and maybe that was part of the reason Fallon wasn't latching. When she did finally latch, it was with the shield so I kept using it when we got home. It was a pain in the ass and I wish I wouldn't have used it at all. We were trying to force Fallon to do something she just wasn't ready for yet and that shield ended up being nothing but a hassle. My milk came in the night we came home and I felt like my chest was going to explode in the morning. Fallon had yet to nurse and pumping wasn't relieving the engorgement. I knew we had to make it happen and surprisingly, my husband ended up jumping right in. In the privacy of our home, with no wires in the way or strangers standing around, I nursed my baby for the first time. Chris helped me position her and talked me through the frustration of her not latching at first and finally it just happened. I was so relieved. This thing that had terrified me was suddenly something I really wanted to do. I guess after everything we went through, breastfeeding was no longer scary or weird for me. Instead it was something I could do for my baby when there was so much I hadn't been able to after she was born. 


Over the next few weeks I experienced the customary sore, cracked and painful nipples. It hurt for the first minute or so every time Fallon latched. I was using the shield every time, I was exhausted and there were tears from both of us, but we were doing it and it felt like a huge accomplishment. Fallon was often nursing more than the standard every 2-3 hours at that point but I had read about cluster feeding and as far as I understood, it is normal for many newborns. We had another appointment at the pediatrician for a weight check since Fallon had not regained her birth weight at the last visit. But then that confidence I had built up was quickly ripped away when we were told Fallon wasn't regaining her birth weight as fast as the doctors wanted her to. The ounces on the scale became the main focus and I was referred to a breastfeeding specialist. I didn't quite understand what the problem was because Fallon was having normal amounts of dirty and wet diapers daily, the most prominent indicator that a baby is well fed. I realize it is important for babies to gain weight but as individuals, why are they all expected to do it at the same rate? 


A nurse at the pediatrician's office helped me get Fallon to latch without the shield because the doctor was thinking maybe she wasn't getting enough milk with it. That was a Friday and the specialist appointment was not until the following week. Fallon continued to cluster feed but was only taking small amounts at each feeding. As her mother, I knew this was her being her, my little bird. But as a first time mother, I was listening to the doctors. Fallon was latching without the shield but would come off multiple times during a feeding and then flails her arms or put her fingers near her mouth and in the way. We were struggling but we were still chugging along. 


The day we went to see the specialist I was instructed not to feed Fallon for at least 2 hours prior to the appointment so that she could observe a feed. Maybe that would have made sense for a baby that was eating every 2 hours but my baby was eating every hour so by the time we got to the appointment she was screaming. The doctor confirmed her latch was fine and I was doing everything correctly but then instead of discussing how to combat her unlatching multiple times and keeping the hands and arms out of the way, the tide quickly turned to other issues. The focus was so much on Fallon not gaining weight fast enough and not taking more milk at each feeding that suddenly the problem was surely that either Fallon was tongue tied and it was preventing her from sucking correctly and/or I had low milk supply. Fallon had been checked for a tongue tie at the hospital and we were told she did not have one. I was also nearly certain I didn't have low milk supply but again, I was listening to the professionals. I left without a shred of my confidence left, a screaming baby and a treatment plan for low milk supply. 

Fallon had regained her birth weight at a weight check 2 days later. I did follow the low milk supply plan for a short time because I was afraid if I was wrong and that was the case, I was a horrible mother for not doing what was needed to correct it. I was having to remember to take supplements several times a day, drink 100 ounces of water and pump after every single feeding. My body was dead, my brain was dead and I felt like my life was revolving around this milk supply issue. If you've truly struggled with this, I am so sorry. But that nagging feeling in me wouldn't go away. And I finally decided to listen to it. I had spent too much time letting doctors convince me there was something wrong because my kid wasn't in line with their perfect charts. I knew she was just doing things her way and I knew I didn't need to jump through all these hoops to give her what she needed. Chris supported me 100% when I said I was ditching all of it. No more supplements, no more chugging water until I thought I'd puke, no more losing sleep over unnecessary pumping. Guess what? Things started to turn around and I got my confidence back. 

Today Fallon is a very healthy and now slightly chubby little girl. My story is unique as is every other breastfeeding mama's so this post was not meant as advice for anyone else. I do not think that doctors and lactation specialists are all quacks and completely unhelpful. It was just that in my case, Fallon's wild entrance into the world and then slower pace in those first weeks made everyone jump to conclusions without giving her (and me) the benefit of the doubt. Supplements can be helpful even if you don't have low milk supply but trying to remember to take them 3-4 times a day wasn't worth the stress for me. Of course you need to stay hydrated and drink extra water when breastfeeding but instead of counting ounces I just listened to my body. Pumping is a necessary evil but it was stealing my sleep and my sanity doing it after every single feeding. I honestly don't believe there was ever a problem and I wish I would have trusted my instincts but hindsight is always 20/20. 

The only advice I will offer is to go with your gut no matter what anyone else is telling you. Whether you're a first time mom or have 5 kids, a mother's intuition exists for a reason. Don't ignore it. If you plan to breastfeed and for whatever reason you are unable to right after birth, all is not lost. If your baby takes a bottle first and you still want to breastfeed, it's absolutely still an option. If you want no part of breastfeeding, don't let others try to talk you into it or make you feel bad for not choosing to. 

Fallon now mostly nurses but also takes a bottle here and there just so that she won't refuse it if I should be away from her for a feeding. It definitely has not been an easy road but I am proud of us for sticking with it because I knew we could do it. It's crazy how this thing that is supposed to be so natural can be so damn difficult. But if you really want to do it, it's totally worth it. And that's coming from the girl who heard nails on a chalkboard when she thought about nursing a baby. 

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Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Mama Must Haves

mama must haves

Cold Brew / Make-up Wipes / Dry Shampoo / Larabar / Tee / Concealer / Lip Balm

We've made it to the halfway point of the week y'all so cheers to that! It's already been one of those Friday where the hell are you? kind over here. Monday we were cleaning and organizing our garage and found out we have a mini infestation of brown recluse spiders. BROWN RECLUSE SPIDERS. I get the irony of it being close to Halloween but c'mon, this is terrifying. Thankfully we only found 2 live ones and the rest were dead but since you cannot spray for them, glue traps it is. I'll be having nightmares for years I'm sure. Tuesday one of the cats, I'll let you guess which one, so kindly knocked my phone off the table and shattered the screen like a dun da dun...spiderweb. Is there a theme here? I hope not. Today was a glorious crisp fall morning so Fallon and I headed out for a walk under clear skies. Halfway in, WHAM the rain clouds appeared out of nowhere and it started pouring. Girlfriend was sleeping and covered under her stroller but I hauled ass home and ended up drenched and out of breath. I guess I can count that as a workout right? RIGHT?! God help me for whatever mishap tomorrow brings. 

As mamas we deal with mishaps on the daily and we all have our little things that help us get through. Today I thought I would share a few of mine in case you're having a week like me and need SOMETHING to be easy. I may be late to the party but I heard a saying for the first time that fits perfectly today and I just love it. Take those sour grapes and turn 'em into a wicked glass of wine. Then drink it. 






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Friday, September 23, 2016

Friday I'm in Love


Happy first Friday of fall y'all! Decorations are up, pantry is stocked with pumpkin and apple flavored things, fall candles are burning and PSLs are on the breakfast menu. The only problem is Mother Nature hasn't received the message yet here in NKY and we are still baking in 90 degree weather. C'mon fall, my blanket scarves and boots are calling my name! I realize it's been a LONG time since I did a Friday favorites post so while the weather is a total bummer, let's focus on the positives.


Can we talk about how awesome these shoes are?! First of all, I scored them for 20% off with free shipping. Sperry quality and style at a discount, SCORE. They fit true to size and are really comfy plus they go with everything. I'm not kidding, I've worn them every day for the past week. It's the perfect way to add a little spice to the jeans + tshirt uniform I'm sporting these days. 

Speaking of jeans, I might just have a new favorite pair. So I don't know about you but back in high school, which was 10+ years ago for me, Abercrombie & Fitch was it. All the cool kids wore their graphic tees and jeans and I was pretty sure I was one of them. I was also pretty sure I knew everything. Sorry mom! But I grew up and left A & F behind along with my know it all attitude so I was pretty excited to find out that the brand actually grew up too! You will still find that cool, casual west coast vibe all of us who rocked the clothes in high school know and love. But A & F has something for us now young professionals, parents and stylish 20-30 somethings. I am absolutely in love with these distressed skinny jeans for several reason. The rips are in all the right places, they have definite stretch without being too tight or loosening up too much with wear. I was warned to size down because this particular pair runs large and they fit like a glove. Now that's a confidence booster for a mama with an 11 week old!

While I was out on a Target run last weekend I spied this rug that's been popping up all over my Instagram feed. In my cart it went and I am not sorry about jumping on this bandwagon. I can't wait to dress up my porch (okay it's really just a stoop) for fall around it. If you follow me on Instagram @hkpfeff523 you are sure to see it again. And again. You've been warned.

I've only been doing this mom thing with a human kid for a short while, but man it can be overwhelming. Parenting articles, social media and just our peers in general all say we should always do this, never do that and OMG you do what with your child?! Not to mention we are usually our own worst critics and constantly making ourselves feel guilty. So I absolutely loved this article my mom sent me and feel compelled to pass it along. Sometimes not giving a crap is just what the doctor ordered. 

I can pretty much always find something I like for myself at Old Navy but now I'm having all the heart eyes for their baby girl clothes. One of my favorite pieces of clothing in my closet is an army green utility jacket I got a few years ago. You better believe I snatched this one up for Fallon as soon as I saw it because OMG now we can match. I know, I know I will pay for this one day. 

Happy Friday loves!
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Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Baby Wearing


When I used to think about baby wearing the backpack or pouch type carriers were what I pictured. But when I got pregnant I was quickly introduced to the world of baby wraps. I received a Solly Baby Wrap as a gift and when I opened the box I couldn't believe how soft it was! If I wanted to wrap myself up in it, I was sure my baby would love it too. 

Babies know only the warmth and comfort of growing inside mom for so long. It's easy to understand why they still want to be held close when they are forced out into the world. Don't get me wrong, I love, love, love holding my baby girl in my arms. Sometimes I just don't want to put her down. But in the real world I live in, shit has to get done and it's a hell of a lot easier and faster when I have 2 hands. Baby wearing to the rescue. 

I love that wearing Fallon in my wrap allows me to do the things I need to do and makes her feel safe and secure. She will often cat nap while I clean or just watch what I'm doing and stay content. I've taken walks wearing her and recently walked around a festival with her nestled against me. I was conveniently able to drink a beer and shovel a giant pretzel into my mouth. It was very lady like I'm sure. 

I enjoy being able to have my baby close and get in bonding and snuggle time while multitasking. It also doesn't hurt that carrying around 11+ extra pounds is burning more calories! Sometimes I even do a little workout while wearing her. It's really a win, win situation and I am so glad these wraps exist!

As long as baby wearing works out, you will probably find me doing it. If you follow me on SnapChat you've seen the telltale stripes or maybe that fuzzy little head peaking into the shot. I might have spit up or baby drool all over my shirt but if I have a happy baby and clean bathrooms it's the least of my concerns. Baby wearing saves me from ripping out my hair over a dirty house, Fallon from having meltdowns and Chris from dealing with a whole bunch more crazy. 
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Thursday, September 15, 2016

Newborn Necessitites

Newborn Necessitites

I did a lot of research when I was pregnant with Fallon about all the things we would need for a baby. Not surprisingly the best advice came from other moms. My baby girl is 2 months old now and really no longer a newborn. Tear. So I feel like I am qualified to share the things that have helped make life easier for us over these past several weeks. 

I opted to, and thankfully have be able to breastfeed but Fallon gets a bottle of pumped milk from time to time. It's nice for her daddy to be able to have that bonding time with her and gives me the freedom to step out on occasion. I registered for a few of several different brands of bottles after hearing many babies are partial to a particular type and sometimes will not take anything else. It turns out Fallon could care less and will take any bottle. But after using 4 different brands, Tommee Tippee is our favorite. They are super easy to clean and Fallon's strong suck and latch doesn't crush the nipple. It's also really nice that they are small and compact to fit right in the side pocket of my diaper bag. 

Unless you are exclusively breastfeeding, you are going to be washing bottles and pump parts if you are pumping. The Boon Drying Rack is both adorable and functional. It doesn't take up a lot of counter space but can hold pretty many bottle and pump parts if you also get some of the adorable accessories. I love that it's not at all an eyesore on my counter and isn't for bottles only. It works just as well for drying wine glasses.  I mean I'm just guessing. Wink wink.

We decided before Fallon was born that the baby would sleep in our room for the first few months. I had heard many moms singing the praises of the Fisher Price Rock and Play Sleeper so we registered for one. Fallon sleeps in it every night next to our bed. I just reach over and scoop her up when she wakes to nurse at night it and doesn't take up a lot of floor space. The gentle rocking motion helps lull Fallon back to sleep after nighttime feedings and there are also sound options for nap time (on the rare occasion). She does not like to sleep in silence so it's very helpful to use instead of bringing in the sound machine. The other wonderful feature is that is folds down for easy portability. 

Baby blankets are a dime a dozen and we probably have a dozen. They are each great for different reasons but I'm talking specifically about muslin swaddle blankets. I love that the fabric is so soft and breathable and they are the perfect size to make a baby burrito. We lay Fallon on them to play if we are out, cover her toes in the carseat or the stroller and I've used them as a nursing cover as well. There are many brands to choose from but we love Little Unicorn and Aden + Anais the most. 

The 4moms mamaRoo is a pretty nifty invention for babies. I have yet to hear a bad review and we certainly give it 5 stars. Fallon loves to be in motion, all day everyday. This thing has 5 different motion and music settings or you can plug in your phone to jam to your own tunes. Fallon also really likes looking up at the mobile now and we sometimes also hang toys from it for extra fun. It easily fits in a corner and isn't too heavy to move around. Chris and I wish they made them for adults!

When we first brought Fallon home we were all still getting the hang of things. Avent Soothies made it much easier to help her to learn to suck on a pacifier. They seemed so big in our newborn's mouth but the hollow center that allowed for a finger to keep the pacifier in and stimulate continuos sucking was so helpful. She's got it down now and will take other types of pacifiers but she does seem to like the Soothies best. 

The first time Fallon had diaper rash I felt so bad for her. I can only imagine how uncomfortable that would be. I had registered for and received Baby Pibu Bottom Balm and used it immediately. This stuff rocks. It's a pretty thick cream and you need to use so little that our jar barely has a dent in it after 2 months of use. Fallon seems pretty prone to irritation so we now go ahead and use this diaper cream nearly every time we change her. It clears up any hint of redness in a snap and it's all natural.

My Solly Baby Wrap is my ultimate secret weapon for keeping my house from turning into a filthy war zone. Since Fallon sleeps so little during the day and can only be entertained with toys and play gyms for so long, this wrap saves the day just about every day. Baby wearing allows me to get things done hands free and Fallon to relax and hang out or sometimes cat nap. I love that we can bond while being productive and the closeness makes us both happy. I particularly love this wrap because it's so soft and I can throw it right in with my laundry when it needs a wash. It's easy to tie on and I can adjust it specifically for me plus it comes in all kinds of adorable colors and patterns.

I would love to know what your favorites are mamas!



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Tuesday, September 13, 2016

2 Months of Fallon


Last week Fallon was officially 2 months old and I'm pretty sure I was JUST writing her 1 month post. When they say enjoy these days while they last, they aren't kidding. We had the 2 month checkup with our pediatrician and I was pretty surprised that miss thing is now 11 lbs and 23.5 inches long! She's getting some chub in those cheeks, the cutest pot belly and thigh rolls. If her legs keep growing like weeds she's going to have wear footless sleepers or swim in size 6 months. 


It is so exciting to see more and more of Fallon's little personality come out. She's smiling and talking to us all the time now and sometimes Chris and I just listen to her and laugh because she makes the funniest sounds. I love that she recognizes our faces and gives us big gummy grins. It melts my heart every time Chris comes home from work and she sees him, her whole face just lights up. I have a strong feeling that despite my best efforts, this one is going to be a daddy's girl. 


Fallon's favorite things are puppy kisses on her tiny toes, cuddling her kitties, hanging outside, car rides and bath time. She has an adventurous spirit already, always loving to meet new people, go new places and see and hear new sights and sounds. Although she's still not much of a napper, she has started to consolidate her cat naps during the day into half hour or so stretches. Aside for a few odd nights, she's still a champion nighttime sleeper and now goes down around 9PM and wakes up for the day between 7:30-8AM with typically 2 feedings in between. She's still in newborn diapers and can actually wear some of her newborn clothes but she's mostly in 0-3/3 months. It is fun to be able to play a bit more now that Fallon is starting to interact with her toys, responding to colors, herself in the mirror and all the different shapes and textures. I'm not sure watching her kick the crap out of the Kick and Play Piano Gym will ever get old. 


No matter what kind of day it's been, at the end of it, right before I lay her down to sleep, I hold her tight and breath her in and thank all my lucky stars I get to be her mama. 


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Tuesday, September 6, 2016

5 Tips for New Mamas


The first time you bring home a newborn baby your world gets turned upside down. Anything you can do to make your life even the slightest bit easier can be a total game changer. We've only been at this for 2 months so I am by no means an expert, but there are a few little tricks I've discovered that make a big difference. 

Changing Stations - Most people have a whole setup in either the nursery or whatever room the baby sleeps in with a changing table or dresser with a changing pad and all the baby necessities within arm's reach. I'm talking about an additional designated area so you're not so limited. We live in a 2 story house and it was making me crazy having to take Fallon upstairs to her room to change her diaper 6 million times a day. So I bought a little basket that fits underneath the coffee table in our living room and stocked it up with everything we need. I keep diapers, wipes and cream along with a waterproof changing pad, burp cloth, pacifiers and an extra onesie there for quick access. 

Doggie Bags - Okay I will admit this one was Chris's idea and it's a pretty good one. Throwing away stinky poopy diapers in our kitchen garbage can was not happening but taking them out to the garage or up to Fallon's room was getting annoying. We always have rolls and rolls of bags for picking up dog poop and one day Chris decided they would work for icky diapers too. This way we can throw them away anywhere and they won't smell plus it is something we always have around and have to buy anyway. Keep some at your changing stations and in your diaper bag in case you have to change a diaper and aren't near a garbage can!

Diaper on Diaper - Maybe not everyone has this problem but I swear sometimes Fallon waits until I'm switching out her dirty diaper for a new one to go ahead and poop or pee again. After cleaning the mess off of her, myself and the couch one too many times I got smart. Every time I change her diaper I start by putting the new diaper underneath her and then going about the process as usual. When I pull the dirty diaper out to toss, the new one is already there to catch anything she decides to let fly. 

Cream to Go - As is the case with most things, it's cheaper to buy diaper cream in bulk. And depending on the brand you prefer there might only be one size option. Diaper bags have so many nifty pockets and are generally pretty roomy but a big bottle can take up a lot of space. Our favorite cream comes in a relatively small tub but it doesn't fit easily into my diaper bag unless I just toss it into the large middle compartment. But then I'm searching around for it because it falls between the blankets, burp cloths and nursing cover. I had a little jar of lip balm I just used up, cleaned it out and then scooped some of the cream out of the tub into it to make a travel sized version. It holds enough that I don't have to constantly refill it but is small enough to fit into most of the little pockets in my bag now.

The Night Before - In the early days most mamas go to bed when baby goes to bed to maximize sleep time. But just taking an extra 10 minutes after munchkin has gone down for the night to prepare for the next day can make a big impact. Get breakfast together if you can. Do overnight oats or even just gather everything you plan to have into one spot. Pour your morning drink into a cup and leave it in the fridge so you can just grab it or ready the coffee pot/keurig and leave the mug right next to it. If you plan to go somewhere the next day set out your own clothes as well as the baby's. Make sure the diaper bag is packed and have everything you'll need for the outing ready to go. Fill the dog bowls with food so all you have to do it set it out. Even if your kid is a good nighttime sleeper it is so helpful to be able to skips all these steps first thing in the morning. 

So there you have my little bits of wisdom from the first few weeks with a newborn. If you have any more suggestions let me know! 
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