Things You Should Never Say to a Pregnant Woman

I wrote a post like this when I was pregnant with Fallon after becoming fed up with comments regarding my growing a life status. I polled my mama friends and we came up with a list of things no one should ever to say to an obviously pregnant woman. This time around the comments are fewer and farther between, most likely because I'm around so many less adults! But I continue to be amazed by the things that come out of people's mouths when they see a pregnant woman. There is always someone pregnant in my mama world and we just can't believe that other mamas are the most likely culprits! I mean, don't you remember what it felt it like? If you wouldn't say it to someone who isn't pregnant, don't say it to someone who is. And if there is any shred of doubt whether she will take your comment in a way you don't intend, keep it to yourself. You look great! How are you feeling? I'm so happy for you! These are always the best options and personally I'd much rather respond to these comments or questions than whoa your belly looks big any day. So, go ahead and pass this along to everyone you know. It's always better to be safe than sorry when you're dealing with a pregnant woman. C'mon, you know how we are. 

You're about to pop!

Yea, that burrito I had for lunch was HUGE

It's probably a boy because you're carrying low + wide

Actually it's a girl...or possibly a hippo

Are you supposed to be drinking that much caffeine?

Oh there's mostly whiskey in here so it's basically caffeine free

Was this one planned?

About as well as my shotgun wedding

Your poor swollen feet!

Oh I hadn't noticed, they don't feel like smoked sausages at all

Why do you want an epidural?

So that I don't murder my husband

How much weight have you gained?

I just ate a 5lb bag of Reese's so we'll go with that

Calm down, it's just your hormones talking
They also breath fire, barbque anyone?

Sleep while you can
I sure am, ya know in between the bathroom trips, insomnia, heartburn, hip pain and karate kicks to my internal organs

Wow you're huge, is it twins?
We just found out it's a whole litter of piglets

Why We Love DockATot

This post is sponsored by DockATot. I was compensated in exchange for an honest review. As always, all opinions stated are my own. Thank you for supporting the brands that make this blog possible.

Nearly every time I share a photo or video featuring Fallon's DockATot I am asked this question, "is it really worth it?".  We have both the Deluxe and the Grand models and to be honest, we did not pay for either. Our Deluxe was a gift from my mom when I was pregnant with Fallon. Last year I started working as a social media influencer and DockATot was one of the very first big companies I collaborated with. We received the Grand dock and I reviewed it when Fallon was about 9 months old. Nearly a year later I am thrilled to be working with this company once again, because friends, I stand behind this product 100%.

The Deluxe is the perfect sized cozy little cot to lay a sleeping babe down just about anywhere. It's so light and portable and saves you from having to drag a bassinet up and down stairs, from room to room or have multiple for a 2 story home. We received a brand new Deluxe with one of the beautiful banana leaf pattern covers for our pending arrival and now we can send the old one to Grandma + Grandpa's house! Seeing it next to Fallon's dock I was surprised that I had forgotten how truly tiny newborns are. I cannot wait to see our sweet little babe sleeping in it in less than 2 months!

DockATot was also kind enough to send us a matching cover for Fallon's Grand dock. She has loved this little bed from the moment it arrived and truly I would pay full price for it as it's been invaluable to us. She plays in it all the time, piling up her babies and reading books and you'll almost always find stray goldfish crackers or other snack crumbs lurking in the corners. The covers are so easy to unzip and remove to wash and put back on and have held up extremely well against my toddler tornado. Fallon is still an incredibly inconsistent napper but she's improved so much in the last few months. I love knowing that if she falls asleep somewhere other than her bed (usually in someone's arms) we can just bring in the dock, transfer her over to it and she will sleep safely and peacefully. No traipsing upstairs and hoping she doesn't wake or being stuck under a sleeping babe when it's the only chance to get something done. 

Recently we transitioned Fallon from crib to twin bed and it's been so shockingly easy we are still in disbelief. I definitely think a major factor in this success is having the Grand dock in the bed. It's familiar and cozy for her to sleep in and helps keep her from rolling all over the big new space. I think it will be so nice when the baby arrives that each kiddo will have their own, matching covers and all! We are incredibly thankful to be able to work with such a great company whose product we truly love to use. But when I respond that they are totally worth it, this is my testimony as to why. 

How We Transitioned Our Toddler Out of The Crib

I want to start by saying this is not a "how to" post. I'm no sleep expert and I believe timing is everything on this kind of thing. Fallon has always been ready for the next step well before she's either able to be or before other people think she should be. Chris and I have learned this as her parents and 100% are not trying to push her to grow up too soon. But we do follow her cues and try to help her get to where she wants to go as we feel it's appropriate. Sometimes I could swear she cried all through her first year of life because she just hated being a baby! She's been consistently trying to climb out of her crib, obviously craving more independence and the timing was perfect to give this transition a shot before she becomes a big sister. We went in with positive thoughts but low expectations. And really that, above anything else, is my best advice. 

Regardless of transitioning out of the crib we had planned to upgrade Fallon's room from nursery to toddler bedroom this year before the new arrival. The first thing we did was arrange the room as it would be with the twin bed in it but moved the crib there for a week. I'm not sure that it made a difference but her bed had not arrived yet and it just made sense to see if she would be okay with suddenly sleeping on the other side of the room. She could have cared less. 

Once the new bed was assembled and in place we showed her, acting very excited and calling it her big girl bed. We made it all up with bedding and a brand new furry pillow (her favorite!) and let her get in and check it out. This was during the day and not being known for her consistent napping habits, we definitely planned to try sleeping in the new bed at night. Maybe if your kid is a better napper than nighttime sleeper it would make sense to try during nap time first!

I've shared about how our DockATot did help Fallon to nap more consistently, although she just is not the nap for several hours at the same time every day kind of kid and very well never will be. But she also just loves to lounge, hang out with her buddies and snack in it. So we put it in her new twin bed and that is actually what she's been sleeping in on the bed. 

And maybe most importantly, we kept everything else the same. We have a very established bedtime routine that has worked well for us for quite awhile. You can read about it here but the overview is bath (every other night), brush teeth + oils, relax and watch TV/read books then upstairs to turn on the heater (or fan) and diffuser, rock for a few minutes and then go to sleep. We use 3 rollers made of essential oils, Thieves for immune support on bottoms of feet, Lavender + Cedarwood on toes for the sweetest dreams and Peace & Calming behind the ears to wind down for the night. We typically diffuse Lavender + Peace & Calming + Gentle Baby as we've learned that's her favorite blend to fall asleep to! 

The first night I was prepared for her to protest when I put her in the new bed. She didn't. I came downstairs and turned on the monitor fully expecting her to get up and out of bed. She didn't. She went to sleep as she normally would and I went to bed expecting to be woken up in the middle of the night because she was scared or confused or just missed the familiarity of her crib. Nope. She woke up around her normal time and did get out of bed but did not try to get out of her room. I made a huge deal when I went in to get her, acting very excited and praising her for being such a big girl and sleeping in her new bed. Then we ate donuts. The rest of the week, including daddy being home a couple nights (he works nights so usually I put her to bed solo) and even a sleepover with her aunt, went just as smoothly as that first time. 

We are still shocked. And still expecting problems to arise. But right now we are celebrating this as a win. A big win. 

A few things to note. We decided to go straight to the twin bed because with Fallon, you just go big or go home. The DockATot will stay for a little while until we are sure this first week wasn't just a lucky fluke. It keeps her from falling out and is comforting to her and if we have to leave it there for awhile, that's fine! There are some toys in her room that she's been playing with when she gets up, exactly what we hoped for instead of her trying to just leave the room. Currently there isn't anything stopping her from escaping but we will make adjustments if necessary. 

This is what has been working for us. It won't work for every kid. I stand by the belief that the biggest factor is in this success was the fact that she was clearly ready. We just followed her lead!

How To Wash Your Hair Once A Week

I washed my hair every single day for a very long time. That was the normal thing to do and I never thought twice about it. In college a friend of mine went to hair design school and told me about this stuff called dry shampoo. Um, what? Why would I spray powder in my hair? Weird. She explained that washing your hair every day actually isn't the best way to keep it healthy. I wasn't convinced. And honestly this was way back during a time when I frequented smoky bars and occasionally ended up with beer in my hair. Yup, former party girl right here. I'm not sure dry shampoo would have been my best option. 

Fast forward a few years. I got an office job, found a guy who didn't care if I wore heels or slippers and traded in nights out for take out on the couch. And really started to invest in self care. I washed my hair every other night for a while before lessening to 2-3 times a week by the time I had Fallon. I quickly found myself only washing my hair once a week and have never looked back. So if that sounds like your kind of thing, here are my best tips for rocking dirty hair without looking homeless (mostly).

Start Slow 

If you wash your hair religiously every single day, do what I did and slowly lessen washes to weekly. You could do this over a few weeks. 

Use Dry Shampoo

I've tried several over the past few years and for the price, you can't beat this one. It works for all hair types/colors and doesn't leave a powdery residue. Bonus points for adding volume. Brush your hair first! Lift 1-2 inch sections of hair and spray it onto roots. Gently massage into your scalp and let it absorb while you do your makeup, wash your face, catch up on Hawaii Five 0, ect. If your hair seems greasy as washing day nears go ahead and sleep with the dry shampoo in. Repeat in the morning. Or just be lazy like me and wear a hat.

Stop Touching Your Hair. 

Oils and dirt from your fingers transfer to your hair causing it to become greasy so much faster than if you just leave it alone. I find this easiest to do if I've fixed my hair. But I'm a busy mama so I do not have the time to do it daily, sometimes only once a week. I make it a point to have time on the day I wash my hair to blow dry and fix it. A great thing about "dirty" hair is that it tends to hold a style better than squeaky clean hair so your do should start to last longer. If I am able I'll recurl later in the week but I'm a big fan of just throwing on a hat or twisting up a messy topknot.

That's it! Only having to worry about washing my hair once a week is so freeing. I'm about to have even less time on my hands for luxuries like long showers and getting myself ready so you can bet I may even try to sneak in another day of dirty hair without anyone noticing. Wink wink. I've linked my fave hair products below!

Jogger Round Up

I've reached the point in this pregnancy where I just want to be as comfortable as possible. And luckily my job allows for that. If I'm not in actual pajamas I'm in clothes that are basically pajamas acceptable for wearing in public. The whole loungewear/athleisure trend is really freaking awesome. Stylish + comfy pjs for the win! When I get dressed I alternate between leggings or joggers. And I forsee this pattern continuing for the next several months. I love that they can be paired with anything from sweatshirts to long sleeved tees with vests/cardis to t-shirts and henleys or nursing tanks postpartum. So I thought I'd link up all my current favorite joggers and few things I love to wear with them. 

10 Things I Hate About Being Pregnant

I was totally excited to find out I was pregnant with Fallon, but I really thought I'd be the person that just loathed the experience. I'm not exactly sure why, but that was my expectation. Turned out, I mostly loved it. The very end, not so much, but overall it was a pretty enjoyable time. I am not singing the same tune on round 2. While I'm never ungrateful for the priviledge of carrying my child, I am honestly so over being pregnant and I have been for awhile now. Here's why:

1. The Exhaustion - Holy crap I've never been this kind of tired in my whole life. It comes nowhere close to the way I felt with Fallon. This is a brand new level of tired that makes toddler tantrums even harder to handle. And I hate it.

2. The Bathroom Trips - I drink a lot of water, always have. I'm used to averaging more potty breaks than most of the crowd. But sweet baby Jesus this is out of control. I'm getting sick to death of looking at the walls of my own bathroom. And I hate it.

3. The Shortness of Breath - Okay so there's a bowling ball strapped around my waist, squishing my internal organs. Makes sense that taking the stairs with a laundry basket or a toddler on my hip has me a little winded. But struggling to carry on a conversation without sounding like I'm running a marathon even though I'm just sitting on the couch....just absurd. And I hate it.

4. The Food Aversions - I try, and typically succeed, to eat a mostly healthy diet. I do believe in moderation aka giving into cravings with zero nutritional value here and there. But why the hell must so many healthful foods makes my stomach churn? I'm having to shove them down instead of going for what I constantly want....all the sweets with empty calories. And I hate it.

5. The Rib Pain - This is just flat out ridiculous. If a woman's body is supposedly made to grow life, that life shouldn't have to separate her own body parts internally. And cause searing, unrelenting pain. And I hate it.

6. The Waddling - As if walking around with a giant mass in the center of my body wasn't odd enough, let's add a waddle. And to add insult, make certain it's nowhere near as cute as those black and white birds everyone coos over. And I hate it.

7. The Heartburn - I guess this one may actually be the most fitting of the bunch. Half the time I morph into a kind of mythical dragon my husband couldn't even conjure up in his nightmares. So I may as well make it legit and breath fire. And I hate it.

8. The Mood Swings - Last pregnancy I told off a whisk, then left it there on the floor where it had flung itself to think about what it had done. This time I cried because I thought I lost a sock. A brand new sock. A really cute brand new sock. And I hate it.

9. The Maternity Jeans - I love distressed jeans. My temporarily abnormally shaped body doesn't allow me to wear my favorite pairs past a certain point of pregnancy. At least not comfortably. And maternity jeans suck. Like I need the extra hassle of having to keep pulling them up, especially when there aren't any belt loops to make it easier. And I hate it.

10. The Sleep Deprivation - I saved the best for last. This one just really pisses me off. My body is literally growing another human life. It's extra tired and needs extra sleep. Yet with all the organ squishing, pain, fire breathing and bathroom trips, even resting is hard. I mean come on. 

And I hate it.

Just in case you didn't notice, this was written in a sarcastic tone. I am fortunate and appreciative to be pregnant. And there are many aspects about it that I absolutely love. But it's okay to hate other parts of it. It really is. 

32 Week Bumpdate

Single digit weekly countdown. Say, what?! It came so much faster this time. In my last update I said I wanted to start doing them every 2 weeks but since I can't seem to post as often as I'd like, here we are. Honestly, I've been feeling pretty crappy. I am a kind of tired I've never been at any point in my life. Third trimester + toddler tantrums have my energy levels at an all time low. And the position this baby favors is, well, unfavorable at best for mama. I'm often breathless trying to hold a conversation while sitting down. Imagine what I sound like carrying a 23 pound toddler up the stairs. I'm guessing some sort of large wild animal. Like a rhino. Oh and then there's the pressure on my left side that often has me doing the ol' pregnancy waddle. Chris thinks it's cute. Just kidding, he laughs his ass off.  I don't blame him. But he rubs my back all the time so it's okay. 

I'm still having cinnamon cravings, have I mentioned that? I can't remember. It's a common problem these days. On the positive side I can blame it on both pregnancy brain and mom brain. They're both real, ask any mom. We've definitely reached the point where baby movement can be seen through my shirt. I wish I could have caught the face of the poor guy at Home Depot on camera when he saw a glimpse of the ripples under my pink sweatshirt. Fallon is still very sweet about pulling up my shirt and kissing my belly while saying "baby". Crossing all my fingers and toes she has the same feelings when her little sibling is on the outside. 

The nursery is now painted, new fan and furniture moving in next. I'm waiting on a rug and possibly adding another print and a plant but we are actually ahead of the game this time in that department. I can't say the same for baby names. Well, girl names. We have a short list but cannot agree on top picks. I've also purchased zero of the things from my own baby #2 must haves list. Win some, lose some. The name will come to us and those little drawers will be ready with supplies in no time. At least that's what I'm telling myself. 

Until next time, diffusing all the oils to help my totally uncomfortable self sleep!

Mom Truth Monday

I will be the first one to admit that I don't have it all together. Not even close. I'm the person who gets ready to checkout at the grocery store then realizes the one thing I forgot and really need is on the other side of the store. I pay all my bills on time but can't remember to buy new toothbrushes. If I'm showered and my kid and I are dressed it's either because my husband is home or my house is a dirty mess. So although you won't see the evidence in my life in pictures, I'll just go ahead and tell you a few secrets.

I wash my hair once a week

I started washing it less in an effort to keep it healthier. Then I had a baby and quit my office job and it became a necessity. I have no special tricks, just lots of dry shampoo, top knots and hats. 

On average I sleep in my "clothes" 4-5 days a week. 

So basically I wear pajamas that pass for outfits most days, thank you fashion gods for making athleisure a thing. I would blame it on being pregnant but I really just love comfy clothes. 

I don't cook dinner.

5 nights a week it's just Fallon and me for dinner since Chris is sleeping before work. I'm exhausted by the time I would need to cook and Fallon screams + hangs on my legs nearly every time I try. I don't even like cooking so I don't bother picking this battle. Fallon eats whatever combination of decently healthy foods I can throw together quickly and I eat when she's in bed. 

I'm the anti-germaphobe.

I care very much about my family's health + wellness and am responsible during flu season, but in general germs don't concern me. Fallon has eaten questionable things off the floors, licked the table at a restaurant and put her dirty mall play place fingers in her mouth before I think to wipe them #becuaseteething. None of it raises my blood pressure in the slightest. 

I bribe my kid.

I think most of us will admit to this one but I may do it too often. And always with food. Cake pops to sit nicely in the cart at Target. Candy for cute photos. Cinnamon bread so I can just freaking fold a load of laundry without 500 interruptions. Goldfish in the grocery check out so you won't start screaming? Sure! Fruit snacks over karate kicks during a diaper change? You bet. And of course you can have MORE teddy grahams in exchange for silence in the car. 

I'm nowhere near perfect and won't ever claim to be. But those dang pictures sure do hit the highlights, don't they? So just remember, you probably aren't doing at least one of these things so you're already one upping me!

Organizational Favorites

Maybe it's the New Year, maybe it's nesting, maybe it's just me and my weird obsession with baskets. Whatever the case may be I have been on an organizational rampage, tearing through every room in my house trying to clear the clutter and corral the crap. It's been fun to figure out the spaces where organization is needed then find appropriate items to get things in order. I've been getting rid of so much that we don't need, simplifying in general and loving how even the smallest changes can make such a big impact. When everything has a place and everything is in it's place there's such a sense of peace in the house. I mean it lasts 2 minutes when the toddler is around but at least when I go to put something away I know that doesn't mean tossing it in a drawer or a closet then having to search for it later. I rounded up all my new and old favorites if you're on the organizational train too!

Baby #2 Mom Guilt: Part I

This is such a difficult topic for me to write about. I've gone back and forth for a long time now wondering if I should even share my experience, afraid I'll inadvertently offend someone or be judged for my feelings. But after a lot of thought I've decided that now is the time to put it all out there. And maybe anyone else who has found herself in this situation can take comfort in knowing that she isn't alone. 

When I found out I was pregnant with Fallon there was nothing but positive emotions. I was so excited, overjoyed, just completely thrilled to know that I was going to have a baby. Although she was a bit of a surprise, it was simply because it happened sooner than expected. We were as ready as any couple can be to start a family. Chris and I had discussed having another child, if possible, close in age to our first. But after Fallon was born my feelings started to change. She wasn't a sleep all the time kind of baby. We struggled with breastfeeding in the beginning then she ended up ditching the bottle when everything clicked in that department. So we were attached 24/7 whether I needed a break or not. She cried so much we worried it wasn't normal, though we could never find a reason for it other than her fiery personality. I had postpartum anxiety that peaked when Fallon was about 9 months old and I had a fleeting moment when I thought maybe she would be an only child. As she neared the one year milestone though I realized I definitely wanted to give her a sibling, just maybe in a few years. But there was another plan for us. 

My doctor said it was normal for a woman's body to remain infertile through the duration of exclusive breastfeeding. This was true for me until Fallon was about 11 months old. I wrote down that date because I had an annual checkup scheduled the following month and ladies, we all know that's the famous question. But so many people told me things don't always go back to the way they were before so I wasn't entirely sure it even counted. None the less, there are things you do when you want to have a baby and things you do when you don't. We were in the latter camp. Fallon turned one in early July and we had the best time celebrating our baby girl. My anxiety was waning significantly and life was starting to feel less overwhelming and more fun. A few weeks later Fallon and I were strolling the aisles of Target and she knocked something off a shelf. As I reached down to pick it up I had a moment like something you see in a movie. Cue the music and/or slow motion, one of those things that lets you know this scene is something of huge significance. It was a pregnancy test. 

I held it in my hand as I was looking to see that date in June I had written down. And a little tingle down the back of my spine urged me to buy that test. But all the way home I felt a horribly unwelcome sense of dread. I was afraid it was going to be positive. And that feeling was immediately followed by guilt. So much guilt. Here I am, a young healthy woman with the means to carry and support another new life, hoping for the opposite. How dare I feel this way when I personally know people who would probably give a kidney to see a positive pregnancy test? And how awful of a mother am I for having all these negative feelings about another baby when there was nothing but happiness over his or her sibling? What a terrible way to begin a pregnancy. I was so internally conflicted I didn't even want to take the test. And I didn't breath a word to anyone. That afternoon I couldn't take it anymore and took one of the 2 tests in the box. And it came up negative. 

I stood there waiting for the relief to wash over me, followed by the guilt for that feeling. It never came. Instead, I shocked myself by simply feeling.....dissapointed. Huh?! That's right, I was actually kind of sad. I had been in our first floor bathroom as Fallon was in the living room. I was in such a state of confusion I tossed the test into the metal garbage can, that should have a bag in it but never does. I went through the next few hours in a fog, running on autopilot. Another trip to the bathroom caused me to pick the test back up to throw away in the kitchen garbage can where my toddler wouldn't get to it (ew). And when it hit the light my eyes went wide. There was a second line. I swore I could see it, albeit faint, I saw it. It was far past the recommended time frame to read a result but there was a line. I didn't sleep that night. First thing in the morning I took the other test and watched it like a hawk. Sure enough, that second line came up. And all those familiar feelings that hit me when I learned I was growing my first baby came flooding back immediately. It was the most insane emotional roller coaster in less than 24 hours.